Category: Humor

Jon Stewart on Hamas Cartoons

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date February 3, 2010

Last night on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, the host seemed willing to take a chance on a not-so-funny comedy skit for the sake of delivering a strong political message. On an episode when the Jewish host racked up more Yiddishisms than normal (Brian Williams later attempted his own Yiddish too), Jon Stewart showed some shocking footage of Hamas-sponsored children’s cartoons containing centuries old anti-Semitic stereotypes.

Through a hole in a public restroom wall, Jon Stewart operated a Hasidic bagel puppet with a kippah on its head. He reviews Hamas children’s cartoons spewing hatred and delivers a political message noting how “they wonder why this conflict is so intractable and hope so fleeting.” The Daily Show staff must have had some fun turning the conclusion of a Scooby Doo episode into an anti-Semitic cartoon in which the head of programming was old man Hitler who would have gotten away with the crime “if it hadn’t been for those meddling Jews and their talking bagel.”

There was really nothing very funny about the bit, but Jon Stewart was able to forgo a few minutes of humor for a chance to do what organizations like MEMRI and CAMERA do every day — inform the public about the messages of hate that Hamas directs to Palestinian children through the medium of television cartoons.

What made Jon Stewart decide to do a skit like this? After all, it was an unusual segment for Comedy Central’s Daily Show. My guess would be that he might be trying to appease his large pro-Israel following after a show this past Fall in which he appeared overly critical of Israel. As CAMERA documents on their website: “In a segment dealing with the Palestinian-Israeli conflict, Stewart hosted Palestinian politician Mustafa Barghouti and anti-Israel agitator Anna Baltzer. Barghouti presented a familiar narrative of Palestinian grievances of the kind often heard. But it was the pairing with Baltzer that sparked indignation among many viewers. Fortunately, the segment’s producers edited out much of Baltzer’s misinformation about Israel, making the version that was broadcast substantially less objectionable than the original taping.“

The Huffington Post reported on Jon Stewart’s attempt to get some laughs from the serious subject of Hamas propoganda: “In a segment geared toward children, a shocked Jon Stewart rolled clips of Hamas cartoons that depict Jews and Israelis as evil, blood-drinking psychopaths. Even Stewart’s “Story Hole” partner, Dr. Bagelman was appalled, as each clip left the two with their jaw (or bagel slice) dropped. Bagelman, a stale Hasidic bagel “thrust through a rest-stop hole in a bathroom wall,” recognized that the blatantly anti-Semitic cartoons were most likely Hamas’s retaliation for his old kids show, “Jewby Doo.”

Here is the segment from the February 2, 2010 episode of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart:

Humor Jewish Prayer Ritual World Events

Oh! The Plane’s Gonna’ Blow!

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date January 25, 2010

This is a poem I wrote about the incident last week when a Jewish 17-year-old boy caused a U.S. Airways flight to be diverted because the flight attendant thought his tefillin (phylacteries) were a bomb. It’s based on “Oh, the Places You Will Go!” by Dr. Seuss.

Oh, the Plane’s Gonna’ Blow!
By Rabbi Jason Miller
(With Apologies to Dr. Seuss)

Mazel Tov!
On the plane you shall pray.
You’re off to Louisville!
Takin’ off from LGA!

You have tefillin on your head.
You’re travelin’ with New York Jews.
You can pray in any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. If there’s turbulence, the Amidah you will forgo.

The flight attendant will see your odd boxes. Look’em over with care. Then she’ll say, “Hey Kid, whatchya’ got on over there.” With your arm full of leather and your shuckling feet, you’re too frum to take your seat.

She’ll tell the pilot the plane will go down. In that case, of course, you’ll head to a new town. Since your tefillin looked so silly, you’ll touchdown right in Philly. You’ll say, “The box on my hair? You really need not fear!”

Up there things can happen and frequently do, by people much more Middle Eastern than you.

And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. They’ll soon realize you’re a Jew.

Oh, the Plane’s Gonna’ Blow!

You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll let out a sigh!
You’ll soon join Bubbie for soup in KY.

You’ll be just fine because you’ll have prayed. The feds will say “Oops, Sorry!” for the mistake that was made. Wherever you fly, you’ll have learned quite the lesson. With tefillin no more will you be messin’.

Except when you do.
Fly El Al as a Jew.

Please promise us that you will no longer fear. These Hang-ups can happen when you fly U.S. Air.

You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You’ll be left in a Lurch.

You’ll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant phlum. And the chances are, then, that you will still be frum.

Oh, the plane’s gonna’ blow! There is prayer to be done! You must say thanks to your Lord. You’ve done the right thing son. And the magical thing you do with a leather strap, will make you the most famous Jewish chap. No Shame! No one will think you’re just a rube, the world will learn about tefillin on YouTube.

They still won’t get it. But you shouldn’t fret it.

I’m afraid that some times you’ll pray sans phylactery. On a plane, in a train, or by that Ol’ Factory.

Daven Alone!
Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you’ll do quite a lot.

And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance you’ll meet people scared by your Jewish way. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that won’t know that a tefillin is what you lay.

Kid, innocent you are
And you’ll go far.

So… be your name Birnbaum or Schwartz or Levy or Mordecai Ale Van Allen O’Bevy, you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your Bubbie is waiting.
So… daven away!

Glossary:

Amidah = The central prayer in the Jewish liturgy, which is recited standing.
Shuckling = Yiddish meaning “to shake.” The ritual swaying of Jewish worshipers.
Frum = Yiddish meaning “religious.”
Daven = Yiddish meaning “pray.”

Humor Jewish Ritual Tefillin World Events

Tefillin On Board

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date January 21, 2010

Most Jewish people have never heard of the word “phylacteries,” and yet according to Google, at current count the word appears in over 800 of today’s news articles on the Web. Apparently, a 17-year-old man wrapped in his phylacteries (tefillin in Hebrew) was treated suspiciously on a U.S. Airways plane from NYC headed to Kentucky. In fact the pilot rerouted the aircraft to Philadelphia.

For those who have never heard of tefillin, here’s an explanation from Gather.com: “Phylacteries is actually a Greek word for tefillin. Phylacteries loosely translates as ‘to guard, or to protect.’ In the Torah, they are referenced as something to be worn in recognition of God bringing the children of Israel to Egypt. A set of tefillin includes one for the arm and one for the head of the individual praying. They are typically a set of small cubic leather boxes, painted black and include parchment scrolls inscribed with verses from the Bible. They also have leather straps dyed black to help attach to the observant Jewish individual during prayer.”

I jokingly wondered aloud whether the pilot was just looking out for the observant Jewish teen and felt he’d be better served in Philly rather than Kentucky, which has a small Jewish population.

The news story reminded me of a story a friend told me that also involves tefillin and airplane security. He tells the story about a friend of his who took his tefillin on a flight (carry on) several years ago and the security agent saw the odd looking tefillin on the metal detector. He asked what they were and the guy couldn’t remember how to say tefillin in English (phylacteries) and said “prophylactics” by accident. The guard started to laugh and let him go through.

The bottom line here is that wearing two black boxes connected to some black leather straps should really not be considered a potential breach of aircraft security. In fact, after hearing about this, I decided to come up with a list of ten Jewish-related things that may actually pose a higher security threat on board an airplane (with apologies to David Letterman):

10. Waving a Lulav (eye poker)
9. Wrapping yourself in a Tallis (whip passengers with those fringes)
8. My Grandmother’s Chicken Soup (scalding hot, but it’s liquid so its already banned)
7. Wielding a Challah knife (obvious!)
6. Purim Grogger (Metal corners make dangerously sharp weapon)
5. Full Set of the Talmud (heavy enough to bring down an aircraft)
4. Using Jewish Sarcasm (it’s deadly!)
3. Giving a discourse on the history of the Jewish legal tradition (will put pilots to sleep)
2. Matzoh Balls (deadly as thrown object)

And the #1 Jewish thing more dangerous than wearing tefillin on a plane is…

1. Singing Shabbat song: “Bim Bom, Bim Bim Bim BOMB!!!”

Ari Teman Barack Obama Comedy Holocaust Humor Jewish Nazis Politics President Barack Obama White House

White House Comedian Ari Teman Gets a Laugh Out of Obama

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date December 24, 2009

Ari Teman is having a great year. First, the Jewish comedian and founder of Jcorps wins the highly competitive Jewish Community Hero award. Next, he gets invited to the White House Hanukkah party. I’m pretty sure it was a legit invite and that he didn’t just crash an official White House party like Tareq and Michaele Salahi did last month.

Seth Galena, one-half of the Bangitout.com duo, reported on Facebook about Ari Teman’s White House experience. Apparently, he didn’t just shake the president’s hand in the receiving line, but actually used the time to tell Barack Obama a joke. The party was a who’s-who of Jewish D.C. including an assortment of Jewish leaders from across the nation.

Here’s the apparent conversation between Ari Teman and the 44th president of the U.S.:

Ari: Mr. President, I’m a comedian from New York —
Obama: Are you funny?
Ari : I tell jokes about you on stage every night, can I tell you one?
Obama: Sure.
Ari: I’ll say “Obama” instead of “Mr. President.”
Obama: Sure.
Ari: So, they’re calling Obama a Nazi —
Obama: Oh yeah (nodding)
Ari: Which I think is fantastic… because if you thought the Presidency was a tough job for a black guy to get!
[Obama starts cracking up.]
Ari: …Nazi… we have overcome! Mr. President, you have broken down color barriers.
[Obama, still laughing, shakes Teman’s hand again and gives him a hug]
Obama: That’s great!!

Celebrities Holidays Humor Jewish

Impetus for Max Weinberg’s Mormon Song

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date December 23, 2009

When Tablet Magazine published the article about Senator Orrin Hatch’s Hanukkah song, Rabbi Jason Herman, who is part of Clal’s Rabbis Without Borders fellowship with me, was quick to send the link to the article over our e-mail discussion list. Little did I know at the time, another RWB fellow, Rabbi Alana Suskin, was already thinking of a way to reciprocate Senator Hatch for his holiday song for the Jewish people.

According to the JTA, “Blogger Larry Yudelson posted a query to his fellow Jewschool.com contributors wondering if ‘there are any special Mormon holidays for which we can return the favor?'”

That’s when Alana, who is also Jewschool’s managing editor, suggested a holiday song for the Mormons. The problems was she couldn’t think of any special Mormon celebrations. Long story short, Rob Kutner (right) got involved. Rob used to write for The Daily Show and I’ve blogged about his hilarious Purim shpiels in the past on this blog. He now writes for the Tonight Show and thought this was a funny idea. So Kutner wrote the Mormon song that Tonight Show band leader Max Weinberg sings to “I Have a Little Dreidel.”

After the bit aired on the Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien, Kutner wrote on Jewschool.com: “It’s definitely an interesting moment when Jewish culture is mainstream enough to provide a window on another minority religion’s relative marginalization.”

And that’s the story of how the Jewish bandleader Max Weinberg came to serenade the Mormon senator Orrin Hatch on the Tonight Show.

Celebrities Holidays Humor Jewish Music

Max Weinberg’s Mormon Tribute

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date December 15, 2009

Last week, I wrote about the Hanukkah song that Senator Orrin Hatch wrote for the Jewish people. Well, apparently, Max Weinberg (of the E Street Band and the Tonight Show) was so taken by Orrin Hatch’s generosity that he wanted to reciprocate the favor.

On last night’s Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien, the show’s only Jew, Max Weinberg, sang his Mormon tribute to the senior senator from Utah (with help from Conan and Andy Richter). The song is sung to the tune of “Dreydel Dreydel.” Here’s the video clip:

Christianity Holidays Humor Jewish Music Politics

An Orrin Hatch Hanukkah

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date December 9, 2009

At the end of the video, writer Jeffrey Goldberg nonchalantly says: “So it’s just… all it is is a Hip Hop Hanukkah song written by the senior senator from Utah. That’s all it is.”

Well, even more than that, it’s a funky Hanukkah song written by a 75-year-old Mormon senator who wrote the song as a gift to the Jews.

So, how did Orrin Hatch come to write a Hanukkah song anyway? The story goes that Jeffrey Goldberg (national correspondent for The Atlantic) “felt that the song canon for Hanukkah is sparse and uninspiring, in part because Jewish songwriters spend so much time writing Christmas music.” He explains how Senator Orrin Hatch came to write a Hanukkah song for Tablet Magazine:

Ten years ago, I visited Orrin Hatch, the senior senator from Utah and a prominent member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, on Capitol Hill. I was writing for The New York Times Magazine and Hatch was thinking of running for president. We talked about politics for a few minutes, and then he said, “Have you heard my love songs?”

No senator had asked me that question before. It turned out that Hatch was a prolific songwriter, not only of love songs, but of Christian spirituals as well. We spent an hour in his office listening to some of his music, a regular Mormon platter party. After five or six Christmas songs, I asked, him, “What about Hanukkah songs? You have any of those?”

The article in Tablet got picked up this morning by the New York Times, which recognized just how many borders were being transcended with this story. “Adding to the project’s only-in-America mishmash is that the song is performed by Rasheeda Azar, a Syrian-American vocalist from Indiana. But Mr. Hatch is the song’s unquestioned prime mover, or macher. He is featured in the video, sitting stoic in the studio, head bobbing slightly, donning earphones and contributing backup vocals.”

At the end of the video, the senator unbuttons his dress shirt to expose the golden mezuzah necklace dangling from his neck. The Times article also notes that “Mezuzahs also adorn the doorways of his homes in Washington and Utah” and that he keeps a Torah in his Senate office.

“Not a real Torah, but sort of a mock Torah,” Senator Hatch said. “I feel sorry I’m not Jewish sometimes.”

Here’s the video of Senator Orrin Hatch’s Hanukkah song being performed:

The man who normally writes Christian music was quoted in the New York Times as saying, “This song means more to me than most of the songs I have ever written. People need to know the story of Hanukkah. It was a miracle.”

Senator Hatch said his ultimate goal would be for Barbra Streisand to perform one of his songs. Well, I’m sure seventy years ago many Christians weren’t really sure what to feel when the Jewish songwriter Irving Berlin released “White Christmas.” That’s sort of how I feel now. But, a nice Hanukkah song is still a nice Hanukkah song. So, on behalf of Jewish people all over the world: “Thanks for the song Senator Hatch!”

Humor Technology

Shoes for Everything

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date September 8, 2009

Humor Politics

Throwing Shoes

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date December 16, 2008

By now everyone has seen the video footage of an Iraqi journalist throwing his shoes at President Bush. The public has treated it as an uproariously funny video clip perfect for YouTube. The president even laughed it off as something not unlike a heckler at a rally. However, the symbolism of the act is much deeper than that.

Enter my favorite Hebrew professor from my rabbinical school days at the Jewish Theological Seminary to bring some scholarly explanation to this act. Prof. Edna Nahshon (right), associate professor of Hebrew at the Seminary, is the author of a new book titled Jews and Shoes.

She is quoted in yesterday’s Chicago Tribune, in an article humorously titled: “If the shoe fits, duck.”

[Edna Nahshon] said what appeared to be an impulsive caper was really a symbolic act of defiance. “The insult is of such magnitude that Muslims understand and Americans don’t want to,” she said. “It looks more like a prank, like a stupid thing to have done … I think it was intended as a very serious humiliation. It is understood as such.”

After all, there’s a reason why Muslims remove their shoes when they enter a mosque to pray. It was not initially a Muslim tradition until the Angel Gabriel reportedly appeared before the Prophet Muhammad and instructed him to remove his shoes while communing with God. Not to mention, shoes are downright dirty.

“Shoes are considered [by Muslims] the truly filthy, defiling item,” said Nahshon, an associate professor of Hebrew at Jewish Theological Seminary. “Anyone who has looked at images of the war in Iraq, shoes come up again and again.”

Remember images of Iraqis pelting the toppled statue of Saddam Hussein with their shoes? And just a few weeks ago, an effigy of Bush was hung where the statue used to be. Iraqis didn’t stone it. They “shoed” it.

So, what appeared to be a funny prank (like Bill Gates getting a cake in the face) actually was a strong political message. Or perhaps the Iraqi journalist saw video of President Bush doing an African tribal dance without much rhythm and just wanted to provide him with some “sole”.

Humor Politics Synagogues

Fake Synagogue Sign

Post author By Rabbi Jason Miller
Post date October 12, 2008

A congregant came up to me during a break in services on Yom Kippur to ask if I’d seen the picture being widely emailed of a synagogue marquee that instructed congregants to vote for Barack Obama. She explained that the sign said “Happy New Year! Please vote for the shvartzeh!”

I could sense that she was conflicted about this since she was an Obama supporter but also took offense to the Yiddish term used to denote black people which can be used derogatorily.

Well, it turns out that the sign is a hoax. It was made at the Church Sign Generator website. In fact, the owner of says-it.com which operates the Church Sign Generator website, posted an apology (and subsequent update) on the website which reads:

If you’re received a photo of a sign for “Beth Sholom Synagogue” and wondered where this synagogue is, the answer is: it isn’t.

The sign isn’t located anywhere in the real world. It’s a fake photo created with software on this website. There are blank church sign templates which allow people to enter whatever they like for the name of the church (or synagogue, or mosque, or what have you) and for the message on the sign board, and it creates a fairly realistic photo of a church sign with their input.

Someone used the site to create that sign and then they chose to e-mail it to a lot of Jewish people on Rosh Hashanah. I’m sorry you received it, but I’m afraid there’s not much I can do about it.

Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions, but again, there’s little I can do. I can’t control what people type into the form on the site, and I can’t control what people e-mail to each other. It’s literally impossible to filter every offensive word or phrase that someone can enter, without restricting use of the site for people who use it legitimately.

Update: several people have written in saying that they weren’t offended and that they thought it was funny, and that I shouldn’t worry. I hope I haven’t given the impression that I’ve been deluged with complaints; most of the “complaints” were just people wondering where this Beth Sholom was and why they would put up a sign like that. A couple of people found the message demeaning or disrespectful, and I can certainly understand why they would feel that way. For what it’s worth, I personally wasn’t offended (it’s not impossible to offend me, but it is pretty difficult), but I do think that it was in poor taste and could easily be taken badly, especially given the timing.

Best regards,
Ryland Sanders
says-it.com