This is a great clip of Jon Stewart being interviewed by Bill O’Reilly of Fox News. The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart rejects O’Reilly’s running mate offer by saying: “I’m not running with you… I’m not gonna be your VP because I know what that’s gonna be. I get one job, and that’s to light the White House menorah…not interested.”
For some reason, whenever the Jewish holiday of Purim rolls around, my brain uncontrollably starts coming up with parodies, satires, spoofs, and just plain silliness. Here’s a collection of the news items circulating in my head. Happy Purim!
By Rabbi Jason, the Official Rabbi of the 2010 Olympic Games
Sponsored by Toyota: “Toyota… We’re Unstoppable!”
Jewish Music at the Olympics: From Reggae to OyVey
VANCOUVER – With the decision to use Matisyahu’s song “One Day” as the official Winter Olympics theme, Jewish people around the globe undoubtedly celebrated that Jewish music was now cool. I mean, it’s the Olympics! Jews are used to “members of the tribe” creating hit music for the masses, but it usually comes in the form of Christmas music (see Irving Berlin, Mel Torme, etc.). Well, it appears there wasn’t much time for rejoicing because just as millions of people were getting Matisyahu’s upbeat song stuck in their heads, along came a brother and sister duo to set Jewish music back a couple hundred years.
As soon as they learned they had to prepare a folk music tribute to their native Israel, the Zaretsky figure skating team of Sasha and Roman apparently ran to Wikipedia and searched for “Stereotypical Jewish Music.” Their “Hava Nagila” rendition was apparently the Zaretsky’s best guess at what the shtetl of Eastern Europe would have looked like at weddings if only they had ice rinks. And as if their first attempt at skating to “The Music of the Yid” wasn’t schmaltzy enough, they came back the next night and gave a performance that only Mel Brooks could love. While the Israeli skaters’ tribute to the Holocaust was rather quite moving, I can’t imagine that Steven Spielberg watched it thinking, “Gosh, I can’t believe I didn’t go with the ice dancing motif for Schindler’s List.”
For those Jewish people who didn’t feel like the ice dancing competition at this year’s Winter Olympics touched on enough Jewish stereotypes, get excited for the next Olympic games when all Jewish figure skaters will be required to have their mother on the ice during performances yelling at them to put on a jacket or they’ll freeze!
Rabbi Avi Weiss Chains Himself to Female Rabbi
The Orthodox Rabbi best known for chaining himself to buildings in protest and leading rallies for Jewish causes is now in big trouble. Riverdale NY-based Rabbi Avi Weiss ordained a female rabbi over a year ago. However, instead of calling her anything close to “Rabbi,” he sneakily chose to give her an acronym as a title: “AWSHIT,” which apparently stands for Avi Weiss Says He Is Tenacious. No doubt, the name was Weiss’s way to let the Ultra Orthodox know how he felt. But they didn’t seem to really mind the title he granted to Sara Horwitz, until he updated it to “Rabba.”
Now, the Orthodox are calling for Avi Weiss to be excommunicated and banished to Siberia. The irony, of course, is that this is a man who fought so hard to get Jews out of Siberia in the first place. In protest, Rabbi Avi Weiss has chained himself to Rabba Sara Horwitz in an act of solidarity. The Ultra-Orthodox have claimed that this is fine with them, so long as Avi Weiss doesn’t dance with the woman. In other news, the Conservative Movement now claims that Rabba Sara Horwitz is an aguna (a “Chained Woman”) and has granted her an immediate get (bill of divorce) from Rabbi Weiss.
HamanTosh.0 – New Comedy Central Series
Currently, Comedy Central has a weekly series (“Tosh.0”) that shows all those funny videos from the Web that have gone viral. Well now, Comedy Central is proud to introduce a new series that replays all the videos from the Web that are virulent. Any video starring an Iranian in a “Members Only” jacket will be shown on “HamanTosh.0,” beginning on February 31. Check local listings for airtimes.
Conservative Movement Goes for Trifecta
With its numbers in sharp decline, the Conservative Movement of Judaism is deeply invested in change. In an effort to grab media attention, the centrist movement of modern Judaism is now looking to go for the Trifecta. In a press release prepared by TMZ.com, Jewish Theological Seminary Chancellor Arnie Eisen explained, “First we shocked the world by allowing gays and lesbians into our esteemed institution to become rabbis. Next week, we will quickly make the move to grant admission to intermarried men and women. And, I’m pleased to announce that beginning on April 1st, we will unveil a new program designed to ordain disgraced celebrities as rabbis and cantors at JTS.
We have already invited some big-name, dishonored celebrities to apply to our program. Rabbi Danny Nevins, Dean of the Rabbinical School, said, “Don’t be surprised to see Rabbi Tiger Woods by the end of the year.” Also expected to be studying at the Conservative Movement’s flagship institution will be Mark McGwire, who also plans to pursue a master’s degree in pharmacology at JTS, and the gun-toting NBA star Gilbert Arenas. Classes in “Anger Management” and “Press Conference Contrition” will be added to the curriculum.
In what is perhaps the most shocking news to come from the Conservative Movement is that the new United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism CEO Rabbi Steven Wernick has been replaced by former vice-presidential candidate John Edwards, who took the job with the stipulation that a day care center be opened at the USCJ headquarters.
First Ever NASCAR Bris
Following the news that a Bar Mitzvah will take place this June at Yankee Stadium before a championship boxing match, NASCAR has announced that it will hold a Bris (ritual circumcision ceremony) at its next championship race at Talladega SuperSpeedway. The Bris will be sponsored by Fast Eddie’s Chop Shop (“You Steal ‘Em, We Deal ‘Em”). Due to the fact that 100,000 fans will be waiting for the Formula One race to begin, there will only be 2 minutes allotted to the ritual Jewish ceremony, but that’s no problem as NYC circumcisor Phil “Sling Blade” Sherman (emohel.com) has promised to race his way through the procedure in chop-chop fashion. However, if the race is about to begin, Sherman said he’ll just have to cut it short.
Rabbi Condemns Bud Selig Statue
Bud Selig, the Jewish Commissioner of Major League Baseball (MLB), is being honored with a statue outside of Miller Park, home of the Milwaukee Brewers (which Selig owns – Yes, a Jewish owner of a sports franchise… shocking, I know!). Unfortunately, the statue may never be erected because Selig’s own rabbi is standing in the way. Rabbi Ann Heiser-Busch of Congregation Beth Ale in Milwaukee (on the Miller Brewing Company Campus) explained that most people think that she is against the erection of the statue honoring her famous congregant on the grounds that the Torah clearly prohibits the creation of a graven image of a human being because it is idol worship. However, Rabbi Heiser-Busch cited as her objection the fact that the construction workers would have to inject themselves with steroids to build up the necessary strength in order to lift the Bud Selig statue. When asked to comment, Commissioner Selig asked, “What are steroids?”
New Personal Mechitzas Not Good Enough
What’s a Haredi Jew to do when he travels on a plane? It seems like the whole aviation industry is against him. First, the kosher meals are served cold and soggy. Then, there’s not enough space in the overhead compartment for his hat box. And the latest attack is that the flight attendants are convinced he’s strapping bombs to his head and arm in the form of tefillin. The worst part about air travel for the Ultra Orthodox is that a member of the opposite sex (e.g., a woman) might occupy the next seat. However, a new product on the market solves that problem. The Personal Mechitza is just what the Rebbe ordered. This barrier not only separates the sexes and keeps the immodest neighbors on the plane from view, but it also guards against the scandalous in-flight movies.
However, now rabbis are complaining that these personal mechitzas aren’t good enough. Rabbi Haskel Lookoutstein, an advisor to the FAA, explains that it’s possible a Reform Jew worked in the factory where the Personal Mechitza was made and came in contact with the apparatus. Or, he went on, what if one is using a Personal Mechitza and the person in the seat next to you sneezes and some of the treif they’re eating flies over the top of your Personal Mechitza and gets on your Extra-Glatt Kosher meal? That is why Rabbi Lookoutstein recommends putting up an extra mechitza around the Personal Mechitza. In fact, he says that the most pious will simply purchase every seat in the row and put up the new Glatt Mechitzah L’Mehadrin.
I was surprised by how much I enjoyed James Cameron’s film “Avatar.” It is unusual for me to enjoy a fantasy movie so much that I have to see it a second time in the theater, but this was the case with this 3-D film about a futuristic planet (Pandora), inhabited by an indigenous population that is destroyed by a human army in its effort to mine a precious mineral called “unobtanium.”
Knowing that the local tribe on Pandora is called the Na’vi, the Hebrew word for prophet, I went into the theater listening closely for other Jewish references or connections. And I found several.
There have been some very interesting articles about the Jewish connections in Avatar. Never one to disappoint with his scholarly understanding of theology and theodicy, Jay Michaelson penned two separate articles about Cameron’s Avatar. In his Huffington Post essay, the author of “Everything is God” explains the theological underpinnings in the film. He writes, “Avatar’s Na’vi subscribe to a combination of pantheism and theism, a view scholars today call “panentheism.” As scholar of religion Gershom Scholem observed, panentheism is usually rooted less in faith, as the New York Times’s Ross Douthat said, than in experience. Like mystics here on Earth, the Na’vi have an experience of unity of consciousness with other beings, all of which (themselves included) are really just manifestations of one Being, which they call Ai’wa.”
In his article in The Forward, Michaelson focuses on the environmentalism theme of the film. He explains that the philosophy of Avatar “is a bit of pantheism, a bit of nature mysticism and a surprising dash of monotheism, as well. In other words, it’s Kabbalah, as filtered through the Hasidism of the 19th century and the neo-Hasidism of the 20th and 21st. “Avatar” tells the story of Pandora – the world of the Na’vi – threatened by human ore mining. Where “Avatar” departs from classical Kabbalah and Hasidism is in its environmentalism. Classical Kabbalah and Hasidism do not speak in “Avatar’s” environmental terms, because “environmentalism” would have made no sense to people living before the Industrial Revolution.
Rabbi Benjamin Blech, on the Aish.com website, covers many of the obvious Jewish themes in Avatar (Na’vi, man versus God, shomrei adama/protectors of the earth, etc.), but adds some fresh ideas as well. I especially like his theory that the mountains that hung over the heads of the Na’vi population are reminiscent of the midrash explaining that God held Mt. Sinai over the heads of the Israelites like an inverted cask (Babylonian Talmud, Shabbat 88a).
Sergey Kadinsky, writing on Heshy Fried’s “Frum Satire” blog, connects the outsider’s experience of Avatar protagonist Jake Sully trying to fit into the Na’vi community with a convert to Judaism. He also notes the similarities between the Na’vi method of slaughter and that of the shochet (Jewish ritual slaughterer).
I found several other Jewish connections in Avatar; whether Cameron intended them or not, I don’t know. There are also a lot of connections to other religions including Christianity. In fact, I read an interview with James Cameron in which he said he wanted to have as many different faith traditions represented in the film as possible. Supposedly, the scene in which Jake Sully (Sam Worthington) carries the dead Dr. Grace Augustine (Sigourney Weaver) at the end of the film is supposed to be a reversal of Mary carrying Jesus. And I’m sure the name “Grace” is intentional.
Perhaps the main character’s name “Jake” is intended to be like “Jesus” or maybe even the biblical patriarch Jacob. Since Jake Sully is transformed, his character could indeed be a link to Jacob who has to endure a wrestling match with God’s angel (Genesis 32:4-36:43) before his name is changed and he becomes the leader of the people. Jake Sully had to wrestle the toruk to be transformed and accepted by the people. After wrestling the toruk, he is able to connect to the being in a very powerful way. Jacob’s connection with God was bolstered following his transformative wrestling experience. Additionally, Jake Sully had to go to a holy place (The Tree of Voices) before being accepted and it is in this holy place where he goes to sleep and dreams (When Jake sleeps as the Avatar, he wakes up as his human body). Jacob renamed the place in which he dreamed Beit El (House of God). Both Jake Sully and the Patriarch Jacob didn’t realize the places they were in were holy until they fell asleep there.
The “J” name for Avatar’s protagonist could also be symbolic of other nevi’im (prophets) in the Jewish Tradition, like Jeremiah, Joel, Job, etc. or even biblical kings like Josiah.
In Avatar, a Navi became close to another Na’vi by saying “I See You” or “Oel ngati kameie.” Each time I heard this, I focused on the word n’gati, which could come from the Hebrew nogeah, to touch or become attached. Variations on this word include the Hebrew term “nogeah badavar” (to be involved with) or n’giah (to touch someone).
Blech might be on to something when he reminds his reader that “the root word navi really means seer, someone with the capacity to see more than others. And that is exactly the point of the story.” That is, the Na’vi in Avatar couldn’t predict the future (or they would have seen the impending doom of the human army), but they did understand the power in seeing the “other.”
I’m not sure if the name Neytiri (played by Zoe Saldana) has any connection to the Hebrew word neturei, as in Neturei Karta (Guardians of the City), but she certainly saw herself as a guardian of Pandora. I know that James Cameron was advised by many linguists, so any of these connections are possible.
Kadinsky’s comparison of the attack on the Tree of Voices to the Romans breaching the walls of Jerusalem and the ultimate destruction of the holy Temple in 70 CE is apt. There might be some connections as well between Pandora and Eden, with the Tree of Knowledge considered to be off limits and then “attacked” for gain (knowledge of self in the Torah and unobtanium in Avatar). Lastly, I think there is a connection between the name of the Na’vi spirit Eywa and the Tetragrammaton name for God (YHWH).
Sure, it’s possible to just watch Avatar as another Hollywood blockbuster/Oscar nominee and enjoy the beautiful CGI scenery, a simple plot, and a politically charged clarion call to conserve our natural resources, respect indigenous peoples, and protect our environment against big corporations that can afford their own army. But, I think it’s more fun to look for the connections with different faith traditions. Some, like the Pope, will find the religious messages of Avatar problematic. Others, will find deep spiritual meaning in these metaphors.
I ultimately choose to pay homage to the brilliant work of James Cameron. Not only did he create an entertaining epic, he also gave us some challenging topics on which to meditate.
When Tablet Magazine published the article about Senator Orrin Hatch’s Hanukkah song, Rabbi Jason Herman, who is part of Clal’s Rabbis Without Borders fellowship with me, was quick to send the link to the article over our e-mail discussion list. Little did I know at the time, another RWB fellow, Rabbi Alana Suskin, was already thinking of a way to reciprocate Senator Hatch for his holiday song for the Jewish people.
According to the JTA, “Blogger Larry Yudelson posted a query to his fellow Jewschool.com contributors wondering if ‘there are any special Mormon holidays for which we can return the favor?'”
T
hat’s when Alana, who is also Jewschool’s managing editor, suggested a holiday song for the Mormons. The problems was she couldn’t think of any special Mormon celebrations. Long story short, Rob Kutner (right) got involved. Rob used to write for The Daily Show and I’ve blogged about his hilarious Purim shpiels in the past on this blog. He now writes for the Tonight Show and thought this was a funny idea. So Kutner wrote the Mormon song that Tonight Show band leader Max Weinberg sings to “I Have a Little Dreidel.”
After the bit aired on the Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien, Kutner wrote on Jewschool.com: “It’s definitely an interesting moment when Jewish culture is mainstream enough to provide a window on another minority religion’s relative marginalization.”
And that’s the story of how the Jewish bandleader Max Weinberg came to serenade the Mormon senator Orrin Hatch on the Tonight Show.
Last week, I wrote about the Hanukkah song that Senator Orrin Hatch wrote for the Jewish people. Well, apparently, Max Weinberg (of the E Street Band and the Tonight Show) was so taken by Orrin Hatch’s generosity that he wanted to reciprocate the favor.
On last night’s Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien, the show’s only Jew, Max Weinberg, sang his Mormon tribute to the senior senator from Utah (with help from Conan and Andy Richter). The song is sung to the tune of “Dreydel Dreydel.” Here’s the video clip:
I was disappointed a few months ago when I received the letter in the mail alerting me that my subscription to Condé Nast Portfolio magazine would be discontinued because the publication had gone bankrupt. But, rest assured, the letter informed me of my consolation prize: a subscription to Details Magazine.
To this day, I’m not sure how Details (a tabloid for the metrosexual?) is a suitable substitute for Portfolio (a source for “serious business journalism”), but anyway.
When the first issue of Details arrived in my mailbox with Adam Lampert, the odd-looking, American Idol guy on the cover, I placed the magazine directly in the recycling bin. I actually hadn’t heard of Adam Lampert (or his music) when the magazine arrived (I think I’m the only one who doesn’t watch American Idol).
When the next issue arrived with John Mayer on the cover, I figured I’d give it another shot since I’ve enjoyed his music for about a decade now. Before I even got to the John Mayer article, two items in the magazine jumped out at me.
One was this photo (click to enlarge) of what is apparently a metrosexual’s bathroom sink counter on which he seems to keep his toothbrushes (pink and black, so maybe his and hers?) in a “Heroes of the Torah” drinking glass.
I’m not sure what is odder: the fact that there exists a set of glasses devoted to the heroes of Torah commentary or the fact that one of these glasses is being used as a fashionable(?) holder of oral hygiene products. It was generous of Details to inform its readership that one can procure the “Heroes of the Torah” drinking glasses at Fishs Eddy, where Torah Heroes shot glasses and coasters may be purchased as well (including one bearing the face of the great 19th century Rabbi Hildesheimer, who’s name is misspelled on the drinking glass).
But the “Heroes of the Torah” toothbrush holder wasn’t the first thing that grabbed my attention and immediately made me question this magazine’s devotion to all-things-Jewish. It was the photo of the headless model wrapped in the Israeli flag directing readers to the article about “the rise of the hot Jewish girl” complete with the “Rise of the Hebrew Hottie Timeline,” dating back to Queen Esther, Betty Boop, and Barbra Streisand.
The article, which carries the headline (and I couldn’t make this up), “Naughty Shul Girls – Red-blooded American goys have found their new fetish: the smoking-hot Jewess,” could certainly be considered modern day Antisemitism. The only thing I learned from the article was that Emmanuelle Chriqui, the actress from “Entourage” and “Don’t Mess with the Zohan,” comes from a Sephardic Orthodox family.
What I was left wondering was this: Why is Details magazine trying to compete with Heeb over Jewish satire. Oh, and also: Why was Portfolio the Condé Nast magazine that went bankrupt?
The Takeaway from Tiger’s Triple Bogey
When it was first reported that Tiger Woods was injured in a single car crash on Nov. 27, many suspected there might be more to the story. This was based on the fact that no one would believe that Tiger’s wife was simply testing the durability of the SUV’s windows with Tiger’s Nike driver.
Now, after days of refusing to come clean to the media about any personal indiscretions, Tiger Woods has admitted to marital infidelity. Like the public confessions of adultery often made by disgraced politicians, there will be those who argue this is a personal matter that should remain within the confines of the Woods family, as well as those who take the side that celebrities’ dirty laundry is to be aired in the free-for-all that is the public domain.
Tiger is a mega-celebrity and there’s no way around his private transgressions becoming public fodder. That’s the downside of celebrity. It sort of makes you wonder why “Average Joe’s” like the Balloon Boy’s dad, the White House party crashers, Joe the Plumber, and reality TV wannabes would really want to put their life in the spotlight. I’m sure Tiger learned long ago that fame and fortune would follow from his extraordinary talents on the golf course, but that the downside would be that his private life would no longer remain private. His lapses in judgment, while no worse than many a common man’s, would be the headlines on the covers of newspapers, websites, and tabloid magazines. Certainly, one lesson he has learned as a result of this event is that he really does need a press release for private matters. The public will fight until the story is revealed and that means no celebrity is free to take the Fifth when the media come calling.
No matter what your opinion of whether the media — and therefore the public – should allow Tiger Woods and his wife some privacy to deal with their “issue,” the fact remains that his adultery is now part of the public discourse. So, what is there to be learned from his mistake? Much like the time a decade ago when our president admitted his disregard for his marital promise of monogamy, the public will be discussing the issue of adultery yet again.
From the Jewish perspective, adultery is clearly a sin; the seventh commandment prohibits adultery. Judaism unambiguously categorizes marriage as a holy act (kiddushin in Hebrew).
In Genesis, Joseph admonishes his seductress, Potiphar’s wife, telling her that adultery is a sin against God. Perhaps the most well known act of adultery recorded in the Torah is when King David bedded Batsheba, the wife of Uriah the Hittite. That act led to the tragic murder of Uriah at the hand of David.
Adultery truly begins a slippery slope of negative actions. It leads to additional lying and cheating through denial. Furthermore, adultery never ends well because it is usually several people who get hurt.
We live in a time when the magazines in the checkout line portray celebrities as “just like us.” These icons supposedly grocery shop like us, drink their morning coffee, ride their bicycle, and yell at their kids in the park just like we do. They have lapses in judgment just like us, too. But of course, they are much different than us in reality because the average guy doesn’t have to issue a press release when he’s accused of cheating on his wife.
It is indeed sad that the greatest golfer in the world can’t keep his private affairs from the eager claws of the TMZ generation, but that’s just the dark side of life in the spotlight. Poor Tiger is desperately trying to fight his way out of the toughest sand trap he’s ever faced and we wish him well. But that doesn’t mean we can’t learn something from his ordeal.
I had the wonderful opportunity this past Wednesday night to see Detroit Tigers radio broadcasting legend Ernie Harwell interviewed by Mitch Albom at the Fox Theatre in Detroit. To raise money for several local Detroit organizations that help the homeless, author, sports journalist, and radio personality Mitch Albom hosted an event to launch his new book. “An Intimate Evening with Mitch Albom and Friends” featured Anita Baker, author Dave Barry, and Ernie Harwell.
Albom discussed his new book “Have a Little Faith,” and dialogued with Rev. Henry Covington (pictured at left), the former drug addict and ex-con who is now the Pentecostal pastor at Pilgrim Church and the founder of the I Am My Brother’s Keeper Ministry to Detroit’s homeless, who is one of the subjects of Albom’s book. He also interviewed local Detroit rabbi Harold Loss, the spiritual leader of the mega-church-sized Temple Israel in West Bloomfield who filled in for the late Rabbi Albert Lewis, Mitch Albom’s rabbi from Cherry Hill, NJ who is featured in “Have a Little Faith” as well.
For me, the highlight of the evening was not meeting with the likes of Dave Barry and Anita Baker backstage during the pre-glow event, but rather sitting back in the audience and watching Ernie Harwell shmooze up Mitch Albom on stage. Ernie Harwell is a part of my life; much of my childhood was spent listening to Ernie Harwell’s voice as he called the Tigers games on the radio as I laid in bed on school nights.
In July, the 91-year-old Ernie Harwell was diagnosed with brain cancer. He knows he doesn’t have long to live. The Detroit Tigers honored him a couple weeks ago during a home game at Comerica Park, but he hasn’t made many public appearances lately. He wasn’t sure he could even make it to the Fox Theatre for Mitch Albom’s event, but he did. And he was amazing!
Albom, sitting on a living room sofa asked Harwell to speak about his faith and how he has come to accept the life-ending disease he now faces. He talked about finding faith as a young man and how it has helped him persevere through many challenges in his life, including his current sickness.
Mitch Albom described Ernie Harwell’s voice as being “what baseball would sound like if baseball could talk.” Albom also praised Harwell for having the patience to let the game of baseball move at its slow pace, and to allow the sounds of the game to be heard and appreciated by the radio audience. Harwell paraphrased Shakespeare by explaining “The game’s the thing.” “It can’t be rushed,” he said.
I enjoyed listening to Harwell talk about the days when baseball clubs couldn’t afford to send their radio guys on the road with the team. The play-by-play would come over a telegraph and Harwell, sitting in a broadcast studio, would call the game from the telegraph making sound effects to add some excitement. Some of the broadcast, Harwell admitted, he would make up since all he actually knew about the game were the stats coming over the telegraph machine. While waiting for the stats to come through, Harwell would make up a story, saying a dog just ran across the field or a fan fell out of the stands. Harwell also spoke nostalgically about the Tigers winning the World Series in 1968 and calling a play in which Jackie Robinson stole home plate (see the video below).
Through the several standing ovations on Wednesday night at the Fox Theatre, all I could think about was what a true mentsch Ernie Harwell is and how much he’s a part of the fabric of Detroit and of major league baseball. Long after Ernie’s left this world, I know I will still hear his voice in my head calling baseball games. He will forever be the “Voice of Tigers Baseball.”
And speaking about calling baseball games on the radio, I couldn’t believe what I heard about Mike Blowers, the former Seattle Mariner and current radio commentator for the organization. On the radio last Sunday, as Jews were in synagogue listening to the Kol Nidrei service and being released from the vows they’d make in the coming year, Blowers made a vow that something would happen in the upcoming baseball game. His prediction was reminiscent of Nostradamus.
Jeremy Moses, in a post on the MyJewishLearning.com blog titled “The Messiah Does Baseball Color Commentary,” writes:
You don’t believe in the Messiah? You don’t think the Apocalypse is coming? As of yesterday morning, I’ll admit that I was skeptical as well. But now, I believe it is fair to say that former Major League Baseball player, Mike Blowers, is Moshiach.
But before I prove my point, let’s look at some of the pre-conditions. According to [an article on Messianism on MyJewishLearning.com], the Messiah will not come on Shabbat. Good, because I believe he came on Sunday. Second, the rabbis believed the Messiah would come on the eve of Passover. Well, Sunday was Erev Yom Kippur, so I think it’s fair to say that the rabbis had the right idea, but got the wrong holiday.
Finally, according to Sotah 9:15, “In the footsteps of the Messiah, arrogance [chutzpah] will increase; prices will rise; grapes will be abundant but wine will be costly; the government will turn into heresy; and there will be no reproach.” That kind of sounds like today’s world, especially in this economy.
Well, I don’t know that Mike Blowers is the messiah, but this really is an unbelievable prediction. Blowers calls it perfectly. First, he says Seattle Mariners rookie infielder Matt Tuiasosopo would be the Player of the Game. Next, he predicts that Tuiasosopo would hit his first Major League home run. Not only that, but he guesses it will come in his second at bat, off a fastball on a 3-1 count and that Tuiasosopo would hit it into the second deck. Unbelievable call!
Watch the video below and then try to figure out why Mike Blowers didn’t spend his time at the racetrack instead of trying to play professional baseball where he journeyed from team to team including three stints with the Mariners.
I confess to feeling very nostalgic recently. It wasn’t more than a few minutes from the time that Michael Jackson’s death was announced until his songs began playing all around us. The 24-hour cable news networks played “Billy Jean” in their lead-ins, satellite radio stations began broadcasting all-Michael Jackson songs, and Jackson 5 music was loudly played from cars passing by. Facebook status updates, blog posts, and Twitter tweets were made up of reminiscences about the King of Pop and the latest breaking news about Jackson’s death. I was immediately taken back to the mid-1980s when my Sony Walkman was attached to my ears and the cassette tape playing was either “Thriller” or “Off the Wall” or “The Best of the Jackson 5.”
The majority of posts on the Web were positive about Michael Jackson and of his contributions to society through his entertainment. However, there were negative sentiments as well about the odd life he led, his financial woes, and the accusations of pedophilia that plagued his life but never his popularity. Some weighed in that they were shocked he was so quickly being remembered as a hero when there were so many questions about his lifestyle left unanswered.
I read one comment by someone who expressed disbelief at “the media’s obsession with Michael Jackson, a child molester. A genocide is occurring in Darfur, Tibet is occupied, the Iranian people are fighting for freedom, and our nation’s economy is struggling. Is his death really newsworthy? Is this man really a national hero? Does he represent our values? I think his life, despite his musical accomplishments, was a tragedy. Am I alone?”
The answer is that yes, the death of Michael Jackson is certainly newsworthy but shouldn’t diminish the importance of other world events that are ongoing. While Michael Jackson was never convicted of child molestation, there were certainly enough indications that this might have been a problem he struggled with in his life. The conclusion is that his life was certainly a tragedy, but he should be remembered as someone who entertained generations, revolutionized music and dance, became a pop culture phenomenon, and made society think differently about race. While this might not make him a national hero in the way in which heroes should be considered, his death forces us to be nostalgic about his music and to recognize him as a creative genius.
Perhaps the biggest issue is whether it is fair to bring up the negative questions about Jackson’s life or to only remember his as the larger-than-life entertainer. I recall the time I was asked to officiate at a funeral for a man who was not well-liked by his family and had a history of illegal activities. He lived a lonely life and was regarded as a mean, old man by his neighbors. Meeting with his family members, they shared several negative stories about his life but then asked me to not mention those anecdotes in the eulogy and to “please, just make him look good.” And that is precisely what I did. In remembering him, it wasn’t appropriate to focus on his unfortunate life. After all, he wasn’t able to defend himself.
And so it is with Michael Jackson. There are some individuals who will only be known for their horrific acts, like Hitler and Pol Pot, or Jeffrey Dahmer and Charles Manson. Michael Jackson was known for his tremendous contributions to pop culture.
My colleague, Rabbi David Kay, delivered a d’var Torah earlier this week in which he explained that there exists an “interpretation that the sin for which Moses is punished by being denied entry into the Promised Land was actually omitted from the Torah out of respect for him.” Rabbi Kay suggested that perhaps we can learn from this to resist the temptation to dredge up dirt on those in the public eye, particularly after they have passed on and are unable to defend themselves.
Let us not focus on his alleged transgressions. Michael Jackson, in death, should be remembered for his musical talent and for entertaining the world as the “King of Pop.” He should be memorialized as a cultural icon who gave so much. If there is a lesson to learn from his life, it is that even the world’s biggest celebrities remain human.
Rabbi Avi Shafran (right) never ceases to amaze me. He is the director of public affairs of Agudath Israel of America and the unofficial spokesman for Orthodox Judaism. Shafran is skilled, yet dangerous, with the pen. He has made a career out of writing op-ed pieces that defend Orthodoxy and delegitimize the non-Orthodox.
His latest op-ed piece is sure to shock. It is shocking in the way that the self-proclaimed “King of All Media”, Howard Stern, says outrageous and sensational things. People will do a double-take at the first sentence alone.
In his editorial for the JTA, “Bernie, Sully and Me”, Shafran writes:
Something tells me I won’t make any new friends (and might even lose some old ones) if I confess to harboring some admiration for Bernard Madoff.
And to make things worse, I can’t muster much for Captain Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger, the pilot who safely landed a full commercial airliner in the Hudson River back in January.
Let me try to explain. Please.
Mr. Madoff committed a serious economic crime on an unprecedented scale for such wrongdoing, and in the process ruined the financial futures of numerous people and institutions, including charitable ones, worldwide. There can be no denying that.
Rabbi Shafran makes the point that at least Bernie Madoff did teshuvah. He ceased his Ponzi scheme (after decades), confessed his sins, apologized, and will now serve prison time. Shafran finds Madoff’s contrition to be admirable and can’t understand how folks who were bilked by the Ponzi schemer, like Elie Wiesel, get off calling for horrific punishment for his sins. Shafran cites Jewish law which does not differentiate between one who steals a small amount of money (“pilfering a dime”) and a thief like Madoff who scammed people out of billions of dollars. Shafran seems to say that halakhically (according to Jewish law), Madoff is no worse than one who cheats on his taxes thereby “defrauding 300 million of his fellow citizens”.
Shafran then takes up the issue of whether Chelsey “Sully” Sullenberger, the U.S. Airlines pilot who miraculously landed his doomed plane in the Hudson River, is a hero. He writes:
No such sublimity of spirit, though, was in evidence in any of the public acts or words of Mr. Sullenberger. He saved 155 lives, no doubt about it, and is certainly owed the gratitude of those he saved, and of their families and friends. And he executed tremendous skill.
But no moral choice was involved in his act. He was on the plane too, after all; his own life depended on undertaking his feat no less than the lives of others. He did what anyone in terrible circumstances would do: try to stay alive.
Shafran even goes so far as to criticize Pilot Sullenberger for not acknowledging God (“the One Who instilled such astounding abilities in His creations”) for the miracle or for granting him his piloting skills. That’s a harsh critique right there, but Shafran continues. He chastises Sullenberger for signing a $3 million book deal with HarperCollins and agreeing to a second book of inspirational poems, while Bernard Madoff will languish in jail for the rest of his life.
Shafran poetically concludes his essay declaring that he is “unmoved by the pilot, and, at least somewhat, inspired by the penitent”.
Okay, because he is a fine writer, Shafran is able to explain why he draws inspiration from Madoff and why the hero pilot doesn’t do anything for him. But, we should take this editorial for what it is: sensational journalism.
According to Maimonides, Madoff hasn’t even done teshuvah yet. Has he been in a position to commit the same crime again and chose not to? I don’t think we know the answer to that. With regard to Sullenberger, I suppose it’s true that he was on the plane too and his own life depended on undertaking his feat. But it was both his skill as a pilot, and his ability to perform under such pressure, that make him a hero. No one should try and take that away from him. And if he chooses not to publicly acknowledge his Creator, well, that’s his prerogative. And only someone like Rabbi Shafran would go the extreme of publicly admonishing him for this omission.
My conclusions: 1) Avi Shafran is a good writer; 2) Avi Shafran likes to make sensational statements that attract attention; 3) Bernie Madoff is still evil; 4) Pilot Sully is still a hero.
Update: On April 6, Avi Shafran issued an apology for his essay. Shafran wrote:
My recent Am Echad Resources essay “Bernie, Sully and Me” has generated substantial criticism from many readers, including people whose opinions I deeply respect. I have come to the conclusion that that there were errors in both the content and tone of the essay, for which I apologize. My main goal in publishing these essays is to help people understand eternal Jewish truths. Unfortunately, here I chose unsuitable examples for the concepts I sought to impart, failing to accomplish that goal and offending many people in the process. I am grateful, as always, for the constructive comments and feedback I received from my readership, whose confidence I hope to retain going forward.
JTA reported that both Rabbi Eric Yoffie (president of the Union for Reform Judaism) and Rabbi Tzvi Hersh Weinreb (head of the Orthodox Union) wrote blistering op-eds in response to Shafran’s views. Yoffie wrote that “Shafran completely misinterprets Jewish teachings on repentance” and his views demonstrate “ignorance of Jewish tradition”.